Five, 11pm

Every "TV personality" has at least one alliterative adjective that's suitable for a family newspaper. (Plenty have adjectives that aren't.) Thus Daring Donal takes to the streets of Newcastle with Paddy Conroy, a Geordie hardman. Conroy finds himself oddly impotent - he's been released from prison on licence but has a couple of hitmen after him. He can do nothing but watch his step. This isn't as easy as it sounds, as he wears an eye patch. It gives him the look of Captain Pugwash, but as he's been inside for kidnap and torture, we'll leave the jokes there.

Tuesday November 21, 2006
Gareth McLean
The Guardian
http://www.guardian.co.uk/tv_and_radio/story/0,,1952994,00.html